Understanding Self Acceptance

In order to achieve effective results, through self-counselling, an individual will have to willingly explore a number of essential qualities. These include self-acceptance and the ability to work towards creating positive changes in the behaviour, thoughts and emotions that are considered to be unacceptable.

What is Self-Acceptance?
Being accepted for who you are, regardless of your thoughts, beliefs, feelings, values and behaviour is a liberating experience. It allows us to move through life with less concern about holding ourselves in check.

Acceptance usually comes after other people have taken the time to understand who we are, what we do and how we deal with issues and situations, as well as how we interact with other people. If we feel judgment is being passed on us however, it creates a barrier, which may stop an individual accepting him or herself.

Being able to accept ourselves fully can only happen if we accept that our psyche does not judge us in any way, and that it will therefore help us overcome our issue with acceptance of self.

When we judge others, or ourselves, we are being non-accepting. Our psyche, or inner self however, accepts us without questioning, although we will often attempt to work against it by trying to be someone we are not or by acting in a way that does not feel natural to us. Putting ourselves down, being harshly self- critical or concentrating on our weaknesses are all actions of non-acceptance.

Bridging the Gap
Self-counselling provides an opportunity to explore all the areas of our personality or behaviour that we do not like or accept. Developing our skills and personal awareness of self-acceptance can only be possible if we recognise that changes need to be made, and are prepared to accept this. In order to make the changes we want to we need to bridge the gap between our current actual state of self-acceptance and the ideal.

Although perfect acceptance probably does not exist, we can work towards bridging the gap, between what we have and what we would ideally like to have, by being open to exploring feelings and emotions through self-counselling and personal development and growth.

Working With Your Psyche
By listening to yourself you will be able to identify the parts of you, and your behaviour, that you do not accept. This may include behaviours and reactions that you would like to change, habits that you would like to break and other things or thoughts that you have which are no longer useful to your personal progress and development. Reviewing this list, from time to time, is a useful exercise that will enable you to acknowledge your continued progress.

Understanding how your personal non-acceptance interferes and creates issues in your relationships with others will enable you to pay closer attention to behaviour. By accepting that you will have to make changes you can begin to identify the best solutions for the outcome that you want to achieve. Letting go of the feeling that everyone, and everything, has to be perfect will also help you deal with self-acceptance.

The Counselor’s Guide UK

All that glitters … LGBTQI people in the US also have issues

Well many folks watching television etc and seeing the mainstream lgbt issues think all is well and queer people are doing well overall in the United States. Well … wrong, the same bread and butter issues come across probably amplified in our context as our social services do not provide benefits specific to lgbt issues. I was sent a story with this video below linked to a PBS documentary on working class lgbt advocacy issues.

40 years after the Stonewall uprising, the LGBT movement is more visible than ever. But many queer people who do not conform to the image of gender, race and class most pervasive in the media, remain largely invisible-even to the movement. This month, we look at how LGBT people living on the economic margins of our society are organizing themselves to find housing, improve their professional skills, and obtain employment and health care.

Indeed a reality check and all the more reasons we should fix our own business instead of relying on the dream of asylum seeking, it’s not an easy road folks as we have seen before many Jamaicans and other nationalities who go to these countries do not adjust well to their new environments and fall in the poverty cracks and find it hard to rebuild or reshape their lives.

Gender non conforming people have it double whammy as here as well often times living in deep stealth or regularise themselves to survive and avoid problems of stigma and violent reactions.

Please watch the full video and think on these things.



Promoting homosexuality? No, its about freedom of choice, privacy & tolerance

In Jamaica today many of the anti gay lobby flex their muscles every now and again by grabbing a Bible or the law books and beating us over the head damming us to hell already and saying gays are trying to promote homosexuality as if it’s some contagious disease that you get on touch or contact and reminding us buggery is illegal. Some including lawyers and journalists also make the mistake to say homosexuality is illegal when it is not, morality cannot be legislated and this is not a theocracy though by the looks of it we are slowly getting there. It is buggery, the physical act of anal penetration that the law is concerned with not the other factors and stereotypes of the gay lifestyle.

They also seem to forget that heterosexuals also practice anal sex when presenting their arguments. Intertwined and interwoven in all of that is the hypocrisy and classism where many of these same “moralists” mainly from middle and upper class Jamaica who speak out in public on airwaves and in print through sometimes hateful letters to the respective editors and or editorials have gay friends in their social circles but of course they are rich and educated so those are spared the insults, innuendo and rage that is presented otherwise.

This same anti gay lobby which includes learned professionals, Members of Parliament, legal and religious luminaries would much prefer if we kept our “filth” as MP Ernest Smith calls it to ourselves as he said in a recent interview presented on a Worldfocus report about stigma on homosexuals in Jamaica and HIV. The gay haters pontificate with great pomp and ceremony using the “majority” opinion that battyman fi dead (gays are to die) or at least we must not be seen or heard.


Find more videos like this on GLBTQ Jamaica LINKUP

He has been unable to prove his statements about gays being violent, if gays were violent half the stuff that reach us including the horrific acts of homophobic violence would have been responded to or be less as people wouldn’t mess with us to begin with. Doesn’t he realise that we are in a failed state right now?
also see: “Keep it to Yuself mentality” on homosexuality part 2 …. on “str8 Jamaica (part 1 linked) and Homophobic Violence Ernie Smith & Venom from this Blog.

Yet while all this is going on the proposed Charter of Rights has been stalling in the Senate and in the house we are then told that consensual buggery is also illegal in the recently updated Sexual Offences Bill get the full PDF version here so the Charter when I last saw it speaks to the right to privacy and the whole question of the domain or threshold of ones home or owned premises is sacred is meaningless then. If I as an adult choose to have sex with another man and the state really wants to get me, whether consensual or not I can be prosecuted even by breaking down my door without a warrant I guess to lock me up on a suspicion simply because I am making love to a man. I don’t think we as gays realise how real this is. Oral sex is also covered in the new Bill as well but they have cleverly make it gender neutral along with buggery I think this is so as to avoid the criticism that gays were specially targeted in designing the law.

Why guarantee a right to privacy and then challenge it with pieces of legislation that impedes on that right so profoundly? it doesn’t make sense or am I wrong here?

We seem to think tolerance means that someone gays are gonna get up and try to homosexualise everyone, as far as I am concerned you are either gay, straight, bisexual or any other variant of sexuality that identifies you it depends on if one chooses to act on it. Why can’t we all just get along? we readily watch North American and Jamaican gay themed movies, plays and listen to artists Elton John, Rupaul and George Michael who ironically Elton and George’s music is popular here played even by the homophobic of DJs on radio and in the dancehall & mixtapes sometimes yet we get worked up over homosexuals or the lifestyles.

I think we have the capacity to co exist with ease if we only try or want to. The stereotypical images of gays are often made into comedy although sometimes it teeters on homophobia with an aire of cynicism and scorn. Respecting people’s rights and freedoms from both ends must become the benchmark where we move from, all people can’t be the same and people must be free to choose as long as it does not impede greatly on another individual and the nation in general.


Latest cancellations/Reschedulings list on Buju Banton tour

10-13 Santa Clara, CA CANCELED!
10-13 San Jose, CA CANCELED!
10-14 Los Angeles CANCELED!
10-14 Santa Rosa, CA JUST ADDED
10-15 Las Vegas CANCELED!
10-15 Los Angeles CANCELED!
10-17 Solana Beach, CA (San Diego)
10-19 Albuquerque, NM
10-20 Dallas RESCHEDULED!
10-21 Austin, TX CANCELED!
10-22 Houston CANCELED!
10-22 Katy, TX (Houston) JUST ADDED
10-24 Atlanta
10-27 Charleston, SC CANCELED!
10-29 Jacksonville, FL
10-30 Tampa, FL CANCELED!
10-30 St Petersburg, FL JUST ADDED
10-31 Miami, FL
11-01 Orlando, FL RESCHEDULED!

While those dates that are rescheduled are being picketed by one of the most cohesive raft of LGBT activism sweeping America against any Jamaican artist, the Jamaica Observer yesterday resorted to what amounts to Plagiarism by regurgitating Traci McGregor’s press release (Buju Mgmt team member)from far back as October 5, 2009 and using it to hail Buju as standing up to gays and being successful in a piece called “Buju Banton’s Rasta Got Soul tour triumphs”

They probably need to look at all the dates and venues that have been cancelled with subsequent outrage expressed by not only gays but even city officials in a few instances. Shows have been cancelled especially the all important mainstream states that are avid music buyers such as California. This is the level of dishonesty the local media is up to and several comments posted to the page on the Observer’s website yesterday were not published up until the creation of this post, only the ones supporting Buju were “allowed” to be viewed by the public, just goes to show that even the media seems in on a coverup of sorts.

It can be concluded that the tour is a disaster as opposition continues to mount in new cities that find out that he is arriving and go into immediate action lobbying the respective venues and even state or city officials. Many arm themselves with a copy of the song and translate the lyrics to English to present their arguments.

Simply put, the Stop Murder Music campaign has taken on a life of it’s own in America now.